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Imagine this scenario -
You take your child to the doctor and find out he’ll need tests for what could be a serious medical condition. You thought he had a simple sinus infection, so you’re feeling a little shocked and overwhelmed. You take your child to the car after the appointment and instantly text your husband, trying to keep your emotions in check so your child doesn’t see your fear and worry. After texting your husband, you start frantically texting other family members. Surely your mom, dad, and sisters should also know what’s going on. You drive home, mostly in silence, feeling stunned at what you’re potentially about to face.
The One you haven’t yet consulted, though, is The One who could help most. Is God first on your list when things happen in your life? Do you talk to God on a regular basis, everyday? It won’t feel weird to reach out to Him first in a situation like this one if you talk to Him frequently throughout the day, but it probably will be awkward if you don’t have much of a relationship.
Moses was called God’s friend in Exodus 33:11 (“… the Lord spoke to Moses face to face, as a man speaks to his friend…”). While you and I cannot speak face-to-face to God, we can connect regularly with God in two ways. First, we can read God’s word regularly and consistently, so we are confident in what God is saying to us. And, second, we can talk to God through prayer, about both the mundane and the important.
If your reaction to the prior example was that, yes, you would’ve immediately prayed to God for guidance and help, that’s wonderful. Consider, too, though, whether you’re praying just as frequently to praise and simply connect. If the only reason you reached out to your earthly friends was when you needed something, imagine the response you’d eventually get. (Some of us have those “friends” who only contact us when they need something, and they’re not the ones we get excited to see on caller ID. Does God ever feel that way about us, wondering why we never reach out for anything other than emergencies?)
If your mental inventory helps you realize you’re not praying as often as you should, consider whether your friendship with God is as strong as it should be. You can’t have a strong friendship if you’re not spending time together!
Let’s look at some verses in the Bible that address prayer.
Matthew 6:6-8: “6But you, when you pray, go into your room, and when you have shut your door, pray to your Father who is in the secret place; and your Father who sees in secret will reward you openly. 7And when you pray, do not use vain repetitions as the heathen do. For they think that they will be heard for their many words. 8Therefore do not be like them. For your Father knows the things you have need of before you ask Him.”
Consider some of the specifics addressed within this passage:
Praying as a private activity
While there are certainly times when you can and should pray with and in front of others, this passage is a reminder that some of our prayers are best offered in quiet moments and quiet spaces. Some of my best prayers are offered in my car on long, quiet drives. Where can you go to grab some quiet time to pray? Be purposeful, on a daily basis, about taking quiet time to pray.
God heard you the first time
“Vain repetitions” means just that. There’s no need to pray the same thing repeatedly just to hear yourself talk. If something is vain, it is empty or worthless. If you are praying just to check it off your list, there’s no value in it. If, however, you’re praying for something more than once, sincerely and with a genuine heart, there’s no reason to believe God won’t hear and answer. We see Jesus pray for the cup to pass more than once, so we know that sometimes important things are worth praying about often. (Can you think of other repeated prayers in the Bible?)
God already knows
God knows our needs before we pray (Matthew 6:8). Don’t let this stop you from praying, though. Think for a moment about your closest relationships, whether with a spouse, sibling, friend, or child. Now consider how strong that relationship would be – or how loved that person would feel – if you went without talking for an extended period of time. If my husband doesn’t talk to me for 24 hours, I would definitely ask what’s wrong. How must God feel when we ignore Him, sometimes for even longer?
Now let’s consider the following two verses and what it means to be “praying always” (Ephesians 6:18) and “Pray without ceasing” (1 Thessalonians 5:17).
Ephesians 6:18: “praying always with all prayer and supplication in the Spirit, being watchful to this end with all perseverance and supplication for all the saints”
1 Thessalonians 5:17: “Pray without ceasing”
Does God expect us, literally, to “always” be praying? Does “without ceasing” mean to never stop? Clearly, we have many other commands within the Bible that require we do other things, so literally praying constantly isn’t the requirement. The idea then is to be always in a prayerful spirit. Are you actively ready to pray in all conditions? Do you look for opportunities to reach out to God, or has praying become a ritual reserved only for specific times, like before you eat a meal?
Consider these ideas for how to become more naturally prayerful during your daily interactions:
When you get in your car to drive, pray before for safety, and pray afterwards with gratitude
When you wash a load of clothes, offer gratitude for the clothing and for the individual people who wear them
When you see birds, thank God for loving you even more than the birds of the air
When your child makes a mistake, pray for patience and understanding and for the ability to guide her/him back to the right path
When you deal with grouchy coworkers, pray for ways to improve your own attitude and pray for whatever might be causing them to be grouchy
When you prepare a meal for your family, thank God for each person who was involved in helping (this could include the farmer who grew the vegetables, the grocer you bought your food from, the people in the fields who picked the crops, your children who helped you set the table, etc.)
What are other times you can pray during your normal day?
God offers us the opportunity to connect directly with Him, and, through that, an opportunity to experience peace.
Philippians 4:6-7: “6Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God; 7 and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.”
One of my favorite reminders of this passage comes from this treasured hymn:
“What a Friend We Have in Jesus”
Written by Joseph M. Scriven
What a friend we have in Jesus,
All our sins and griefs to bear!
What a privilege to carry
Everything to God in prayer!
Oh, what peace we often forfeit,
Oh, what needless pain we bear,
All because we do not carry
Everything to God in prayer!
Have we trials and temptations?
Is there trouble anywhere?
We should never be discouraged—
Take it to the Lord in prayer.
Can we find a friend so faithful,
Who will all our sorrows share?
Jesus knows our every weakness;
Take it to the Lord in prayer.
Are we weak and heavy-laden,
Cumbered with a load of care?
Precious Savior, still our refuge—
Take it to the Lord in prayer.
Do thy friends despise, forsake thee?
Take it to the Lord in prayer!
In His arms He’ll take and shield thee,
Thou wilt find a solace there.
Blessed Savior, Thou hast promised
Thou wilt all our burdens bear;
May we ever, Lord, be bringing
All to Thee in earnest prayer.
Soon in glory bright, unclouded,
There will be no need for prayer—
Rapture, praise, and endless worship
Will be our sweet portion there.
When I find my prayer life lacking and find myself stressed and worried, I try to hit reset by digging into God’s word and thinking of this song (singing it to myself or out loud if necessary). Are there times we’ve given up peace and comfort because we tried to do it ourselves instead of reaching out to The One who could handle it?
Many godly books have already been written on prayer, and entire studies have focused on specific examples of prayer. A few examples worth considering in this chapter, though, might be:
Hannah's prayer for a son (1 Samuel 1) – Hannah’s prayer was fervent and specific, and she remembered her promise after God followed through.
What else can you learn from Hannah’s prayer?
David's prayer for forgiveness (Psalm 51) - David was sorrowful, penitent, and willing to sacrifice.
What else can you learn from David’s prayer?
We see many times throughout the Bible where Jesus addressed His Father, some in more formal senses (examples included below) and some less formal but equally important. If we think of our prayers as conversations with our Father, we understand just how important it is to regularly engage in prayer. After all, if you never spoke to your earthly father (face-to-face, via text, phone, or email), would he really consider that a relationship?
Let’s examine some of the prayers we see Jesus pray within the New Testament.
When the apostles specifically asked Him for guidance on prayer, he answered them with what often gets called “The Lord’s Prayer.” It’s likely better called “The Model Prayer,” as it was used as a teaching example and likely mimicked the prayer He prayed all night at Gethsemane. It didn’t mimic His prayer in John 17.
Looking more specifically at those three examples:
Christ's model prayer (Matthew 6:9-13; Luke 11:1-4) - Jesus’ prayer was relatively short, directed toward the Father, and included daily requests.
Christ’s prayer at Gethsemane (Matthew 26:36-46; Mark 14:32-42; Luke 22:39-46) – Jesus’ prayer lasted all night, included a repeated request, and demonstrated humility by acknowledging God’s will.
Read the full text of Christ’s prayer in John 17. Note Jesus’ posture and who specifically He prayed for within these verses.
What else can you learn about Christ and about how Christians should pray from the way He prayed in these passages?
Emily R. Workman - emworkman@gmail.com
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